Trust

From our beginnings, we are expected to trust.

Trust that we are protected,

cared for,

loved unconditionally.

Over time, trust proves maladaptive.

A child beaten and abused returns to his abusers, hearing the violations are “because he loved you” or “it’s your fault” – messages repeated endlessly into adulthood.

Sharing feelings and fears, then dismissed with “You’re fucking kidding me,” an admonishment of “not dealing with your crazy,” or exploited with lies.

A mother’s confession that she loved a sibling more “we just have a special connection” as the lesser one struggles to care for her.

Trust. A social construct to ensnare the naive and gullible. A requisite to intimacy of all sorts. A conundrum.

Pondering this moment when everything seems good, questioning wisdom of trust, longing to believe.

Trust is the leap of faith.

Trust is silence when a heart overflows and words fail to explain.

Trust me, trust you.